Speedy Advice In Newport Box 100s – An Introduction

Newport:

This is basically the second brand that is really continued the shelves due to university students. Newports are somehow the “classy” but nonetheless non-pretentious model of cigarettes (Benson & Hedges being the classy and pretentious brand), for those young-uns who still feel that their habit will be worth $6.50 a pack for some reason (in Wyoming, between $5 and $5.50 is approximately average price for cigarettes). Actually, I didn’t even like newport cigarettes when I tried them, and thought the Marlboro Menthols got me to gag less… but I’m no smoker, what exactly the hell do I know, right? They are more expensive, therefore they have to be better! Is practical for me. And whenever you’re a college student, attempting to look cool, you want a pricey cigarette that doesn’t cause you to appear to be a stuck-up snob but is also menthol in order to smoke it without coughing just like the poser you are.

Camel:

Like Marlboros, there are actually just so many different types of Camel offered that it’s tough to generalize customers in the brand in general with about 20 different varieties of Camels available. When it comes to individual types of Camels, well, you possess Camel Crush and Camel No. 9, both of which are bought almost exclusively by effeminate men and roughly equally effeminate women. You have your Camel Wides, targeted at people who would like to smoke two cigarettes simultaneously but are too lazy to light two cigarettes or perhaps to roll their own. The perfect solution? BIGGER CIGARETTES, for twice the cost! Interestingly, a great deal of fat people buy Wides… oh the irony for the reason that. A few acting majors I realize personally who regular the store buy Camel Reds… and they’re literally the sole People that buy them. Not really sure why. And finally, there are the filter-less Camels, which, so far as I notice, are merely bought by hard-asses who enjoy to tempt death and then punch him within his stupid deathly FACE.

Basic:

I don’t sell too a number of these, and when I do, it’s to old individuals who make one of two assumptions about them. Some are just like the Hipsters who enjoy American Spirit and assume that “organic tobacco” creates a better cigarette… while it just makes me curious what inorganic tobacco is a lot like. Others are strange, confused old individuals who imagine that because they’re called “Basic”, they’re the newport 100s cigarettes. They are not.

Sonoma:

These are cheapest cigarettes we sell. Understandably, the only people who buy them are often the same people buying chips and soda using their food stamps, then throwing together alteration to buy cigarettes while complaining under their breath that their food stamps won’t cover them or energy drinks anymore (discuss unreasonable, right?). Seriously, anyone who has kids and uses their food stamps on fast food should be required to get a tattoo on his or her forehead that reads “I’m an awful person”, but that’s getting off topic (I do believe I’d be devqpky54 okay with them buying gourmet food on the food stamps, start to see the correlating post below). No one really enjoys Sonoma. They’re the Keystone of cigarettes … they’ll assist you in getting your fix cheaply, but at what greater cost?

Benson & Hedges:

Only one form of person buys these, and therefore person is the type of massive pretentious prick who thinks he’s superior to everybody else while he buys a $9 pack of newport short cigarettes. Actually, only one person on my shift buys them, and I hate him (start to see the above reason). He comes in a couple of times a week, and i also still don’t know his name, so let’s just call him Claude. Seriously Claude, no one thinks you’re cool for purchasing the highest priced cigarettes we sell, dude. Also, loose the pedo-stache.

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